I am ‘A Cut From Different Cloth’…💫

I am ‘A Cut From Different Cloth’….🌹

I used to think I was the strangest species in the planet; But then I met some like-minded people and thought, there are few many other people in the world that must be someone just like me who feels weird and outlandish and flawed in the same way I do. Happy. And felt that I am A cut from different fabric.

We’re not defined by who we were in the past. Our life is defined by who we are each day, regardless of the past. Everyone has different experiences and reasons why we behave and feel the way we do. In worst case scenario, I had been adamant daughter to my parents. Some wrong turns I took in my past had a lasting impact on my mind that will forever be engraved in my head for I should never repeat them in my life ever. Luckily, those things have landed me here in the beautiful place of awakening to my self-awareness and self-knowledge. One can not become the best without first being the worst. From those experiences, I have learned some golden lessons that have changed the core essence of my approach towards life that I appreciate all the things and lessons in the past for the good but I never ever carry any dirty baggage from the past and get stuck me in the chain of past except the lessons, nor I do think of the future and resist or deprive myself of what is in store for me now in the present. I just live in the presence with what fits my personal brand.;)

I owe up my mistakes with a gratitude because It’s the most powerful tool for my self-growth; I acknowledge it, cut off the chain from the past and open myself to grow stronger from the mistakes. I have unlocked the passage to the secret garden of my soul with an understanding, a gratitude and love that I am not afraid of any complex personal situations. In fact, I am quite complex on myself and I don’t worry or fear for anything but I have a rich and bright inner life that is being enriched by my self-guidance and I grow from within. I am as genuinely warm as I am complex. 

I am calm and rooted in my own being. Even when I’ve been surrounded by like-minded people, I’ve always felt like I’m way too complicated for them. I am usually calm and considerate and lead my simple life authentically. I don’t have a fake image to maintain. What you see is what you get, some days I am amazing, other days I am a wreck. But every day I am me.

I’ve never really fit in. I completely rely on myself, I am working on myself for myself. I radiate positive energy and shine from within so no one can dim my light. I am protective of my inner selves, I only have few authentic friends and share my ‘true selves’ with such selectively few closest ones. I am a completely different person when I am with close friends than I am with everyone else. I remain very reserved with other people. I really never fit in and that is my real strength.

I don’t live for other’s approval. The desire to feel safe, to maintain social connections, and to be perceived as lovable can drive us to alter ourselves to get influenced by the way others respond to us. With time, I’ve learned the power and the beauty of becoming liberated from the false self that clings to a one-dimensional expression of being ‘good, kind, nice’, and put together at all times. I honestly live in my own reality. I’m not greedy about things. I just find pleasure in little things and enjoy my freedom in life.

I never take toxic behaviour of other people personally. I let the people with the personality disorder play out their act and deal themselves with what they have created. I just don’t attend their performances and be dragged down with them. I am just at peace with myself. Silence is my expensive accessory that I never fail to wear in any occasion.

I live by a strict code of honesty. Being honest contributes to my reliability. I am organized but not flawless, but when I give someone my word, I always intend to keep it. I apply this philosophy at all times: from small routine tasks to critical decisions on which many things depend. I am a person who has the guts to meet challenges head-on and stand by my decisions and failures rather than sweep them under the rug. I value honesty and realness in people.

I operate within myself naturally on intuitive basis. I am single minded in my focus. I completely trust my own instincts above all else and stick on to it. My mode of living is focused on internal experiences, intuition, externally it’s all about the situation, my mood, and energy levels — and most importantly, with things according to how I feel about people, or how healthy they fit with my personal value system. But when I strongly consider my point, When it comes to decision-making process, I would never fail to make sure that I am not getting trapped by my emotions or general opinions of others to ensure that my opinions carry a reasoning and logical weight and truths with my intuition and on what makes sense. I never fall for other’s gimmicky words.

I am perceptive and I care. I often immediately sense the mood of a person when talk to them. I care for people in my life but they’ll probably never know just how much I care, because I keep my concerns mostly to myself. I have trouble in articulating my emotions, even though I feel intensely. But I honestly care a lot for my people whom I have in my tight group and try to make it a better place for them. I am always inclined to gravitate towards my highest degree of calmness which is my most fundamental requirement and connected with centered people so that I don’t have to deal with as much emotional garbage. I never ever feed to fuel my emotions.

I have a healthy ego or self-respect. I have my own strong value system. I am terribly loyal to my own system of values. I will not follow others down a path that does not feel authentic to me. When I sense that my values are not being respected, or when my intuition tells me that someone’s intentions are not pure, I silently remove myself from the equation. I am uninterested to engage myself with others who might not understand things. I crave independence and personal freedom and so I don’t want to interfere with other people’s lifestyle choices and personal truths unless I see them as doing real harm to themselves. I will never do anything that questions my self-respect — I do my best to live up to my fullest potential within my terms.

I value the company of people who share similar interests. I am actually reserved and detached from others. I love exploring and learning, especially when it comes to psychology, self-improvement, self-care, spirituality, and certain sciences. I bond over people’s mind, people’s rawness, people’s charm, people’s passion, people’s style, people’s energy, and so stuffs. When I meet people who can match my frequencies, who reciprocate and who hold the respect for, I value their company and I hold them close like precious treasure.

I am open-minded and a direct person. I never spoon-feed the truth with a big lump of sugar, be it good or bad, be it yes or no, though whatever it is, I am a very straight minded person. Hanging in between is not my thing. Beating around the bush to make people comfortable isn’t my style, honestly. I am sometimes softie and I try to be gentle with others though I straight shoot without covering up things yet with soft blow.

I set my limits. It’s important to be mindful, when someone is in crisis. It’s ok to be there for others and be a good friend. However, if I feel that other’s needs are more than I can support, they may benefit from other sources or professional help. It’s ok to share our concerns in a supportive and loving way instead of completely sinking into other’s problems. I would never feel hesitant or sorry for saying no to someone’s unrealistic or unfair expectations and protect my energy from draining to zero. My mental health and well-being is my utmost priority. Simply a self-care!

I have no interest in discussing other people’s lives. I don’t take pleasures in commenting, criticising and bullying people. When people are gossiping, or talking about other trivial things, I often find myself more likely to be sitting in the side table and engaging into reading something about new technologies, space travel, medical advancements, the evolution of humankind, the age of the universe, or seeking understandings of the cosmos and other more epic topics instead of having a big seat at the table of their foul show.

I don’t advocate for others, but I am focused on solutions. When someone comes to me with a problem, I usually don’t give them advice or my opinion unless they ask. I never simply sympathize with the person either. Instead, I’ll ask them questions to help them better understand the situation and their own feelings about it. My response to their problem would be to look for answers and solutions. Sometimes I won’t relate but I’ll tell a story of a time when something similar happened to me, in the hope that they’ll draw their own lesson. I feel like I can usually see the path they should take, but I don’t want them to do it just because I told them to — I want it to be their own decision. 

I am not perfect and I am not good at dealing with minor details or very detailed tasks. I am not perfect and I would not want to be perfect but I am real, sharp and specific about things. I never enjoy digging into stuffs deep and dwelling on all of the details and stagnating myself over there for a long time but I prefer to get to the bottom line and move on to the bigger picture of things. I am more of a doer and a result-oriented person than running through scenarios in mind.

I’ve never been in the common rat–race society. I live in the present and stay in my little space and that’s fine. I never get myself participated into the predefined set of building blocks of our society to play the game of life that we start comparing ourselves to other people. I avoid such foul minded people. Moreover I am allergic to large groups of people. Instead, I like solitude, but deep conversations with a handful of good friends or people of same frequencies who truly get me are priceless. I always balance my emotions with my logic with a deep sense of integrity. Being around warm, gentle people gives me an energy and a sense of inner peace. I find myself picking up on their joy and positivity and becoming more cheerful and friendly. 

I have an aesthetic sense and I am drawn to finest-quality things. I can find pleasure in things, like good food, finer clothes, finer ambience, finer art, and fine, finer & finest of anything else that has good craftsmanship. It’s hard to say why, but my tastes have always run toward classical and elegant things. But there is something about timeless beauty and dignity that meets a need in my soul. As much as I hate to admit it, the way things look is important to me. I like being surrounded by beauty, and I have refined tastes. My clothes highlight my colorful life.;)

I am a minimalist at heart. I’d rather have ten or so really nice very nice and elegant dress than 30 or 40 average ones. Will find pleasure in having a coffee in a roadside organic coffee boutique than a coffeeday, wearing a simple thin and sleek ring than a heavily crafted ring and so things. Nothing but class.

I am not a people pleaser. I don’t think I have the power and I never force myself to go to extra mile to make people happy. I just share my energy. It’s up to each individual to be in charge of their own emotions otherwise. I won’t change myself for anyone’s opinion either, my strong sense of self has been formed through my experiences and education; can’t change how I feel and can’t change what I believe in (which is tried-and-true, and born of honesty and conviction ). Sometimes I wear a synthetic smile because I need a sense of harmony with those around me when I am around people, with good people but who do not match my frequency though — But honestly, connecting with others can seem like surviving a game of Jumanji for me.;)

I am not good at expressing emotions. I’ve been called rude when I didn’t respond to situations as it was expected of me. Situations like not celebrating as expected, not reciprocating a heartfelt comment, being terrible at comforting someone, not jumping in a bliss when presented with a well-meant gift, or generally just not showing strong emotions. My failure to express emotion might seem cold and may be taken very wrongly by others. For example, when my friend or someone gives me a gift for no special reason, I think things like, ‘how to get them a return gift! they bought me a book, they really are awesome!’ Even though I’m grateful for the present, I usually fail to display how I feel at the moment because other thoughts are running through my mind — even though I am really happy. Showing emotion can be challenging for me, sometimes.

I keep a low profile and I enjoy my solitude. But sometimes it’s been lonely to be me in the crowd. But It is delicious to be in solitude and to be true to myself. Being at peace surrounded by nature with a fine music and a cup of coffee is a bonus and luxurious treat to myself. But I enjoy having a comfortable, healthy organic lifestyle and often enjoy supplementing solitude with some fun activities.

So please remember, when you don’t blend into the common crowd…when you feel odd, or strange, or weird, or like no one thinks like you or acts like you — that you’re really not alone, that your self-knowledge is a gift, and that you’re in good company. So there’s that. 😉 🌹

– Manimozhi Ilango;)🌹🧘